La Nouvelle Vie

August 22, 2009

First Born

Filed under: Uncategorized — konsuy @ 10:17 pm

16 years ago today, we had prayed for a child. Perpetual novenas, somersaults, back flips, weekend overdose of iron rich seafoods, countless doctors and doktor doktoran slash eskina expert advises, and 2 years of fertility dances after, Insoy was born.  Our prayers to the Sto Nino was answered.

We named him Lorenzo after the filipino saint & martyr who stood for his faith until death. His second name is Mikel, after archangel Michael, the guardian of the Church and after Mikel Aboitiz,  the Chief Information and Strategy officer of the Aboitiz group of companies. We had the name long before we met him on the 21st of August.

Insoy had always been chubby as a child.  I never would imagine him skinny because he was always round and huggable growing up. Being a ‘paranoid’ and ‘over excited’ first time parent,  I started him schooling by the time he was 1 year and 6 months old because I read that children absorbed more at this age and learning would be easier.  He always had summer classes and activity to do.  He had countless caregivers growing up. At the slightest complain or hints of his well being having problems, I would jump up and get help.  He saw a dietician when he had problems with his weight, an expert in diabetis soon after that,  tested for dexlixia when he had problems with penmanship, pushed him to a milo training camp to fire competitiveness, sought out tutors when he had problems with his math grades, saw an optometrist when we thought he had eye problems and endless love letters with teachers at sometimes made up comments from ‘yayas’.  Most of the time imagined nothingness, thanks to his paranoid mother me and equally supportive grandmother, the only way to fix the worries was to act on it by relying on the so called experts.

Unfortunately, it spawned wrong signals, a very low self esteem that was fiddled with crying episodes. And so I learned my lesson the hard way.

I (we) spent the next few years, doctoring his ego. =) Consulted him on his preferences, made him boss of the house when we are not around, gave him responsibilities around the kitchen and celebrated milestones on his weight loss aspirations.

Being a first born myself,  I understand how tough it is for parents to transition and do the best they could to sort things out.  It is tough to be first born as well. So much is expected, specially for someone who is the first born Abadingo “surname carrying” grandson and the first on our side of the family too.

Insoy turned 14 years old last Friday, we had a family dinner at a Thai restaurant and watched Cirque de Soleil’s Dralion. We got him an electric guitar starter kit. He will be in year 11 in January. He has grown facial hairs. He is bent on taking up Food Technology / Culinary Arts for his credits next year. I still want him to pursue Web Designing but it is the Math subjects he always detested. I am a pursuasive mother but he is a stubborn son. Hmmm, where did he get this from? *wink*

I am slowly understanding his kind of music while he tries to understand mine.  We compromise on Jason Mraz, Black Eyed Peas, Tiki Tani, Beyonce and Lady Gaga. No more professional tutors for him, I do the tutoring at night. We have tiffs but he would cry it off and I am glad he can vent it out this way (remember,  me mother is Sibya Luha). I am sure the new guitar will be of help too. *hahaha* The hub thinks all the frustrations will earn me a spot at a nearby retirement home. *lawgaw*

I will always be grateful for the 21st of August.  The day that our Lorenzo Mikel came into our life. He is not just our First Born but also our First Love. *sniff*

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March 4, 2009

Couple Tag

Filed under: Uncategorized — konsuy @ 12:56 pm

I enjoyed this tag when I read it from Kaith’s blog. =) Here is our couple tag.

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***What are your middle names?

Bugash and Getes

***How long have you been together?
22 years (15 as a couple and 7 as m.u.). mo 23 na. ang title kuno sa among love story is “zorro”. you are the cause of my zorro. (jokes)

***How long did you know each other before you started dating?
2 days for me. (but he knew me more than just 2 days kay secret crush biya ko niya, hehehe) he watched me from the 4th floor talamban building walking to school from saints. he can even follow the way i walk and memorized my outfits. (down to the blings)

***Who asked whom out?
he asked me out

***How old are each of you?
do i have to answer this? born on the year of the horse. i am older by 9 months, so what!

***Whose siblings do you see the most?
none since a year. but if ever we go to cebu, i would be seeing mine while he sees his. para fair.

***Which situation is the hardest on you as a couple?
currently, sticking to rules for the kids. i am stricter but he bends the rules. he is the 3rd son.

***Did you go to the same school?
we went to the same university and so that is how we met.

***Are you from the same home town?
same province (bohol) but different towns. both grew up in cebu but different baranggays. =)

***Who is smarter?
i have a higher IQ but he is street smart. sa EQ, lalison pa.

***Who is the most sensitive?
we both are sensitive. he is insecure nga sensitive while i am sensitive nga insecure. hehehe (libog sa?)

***Where do you eat out most as a couple?
we are adventurous with food but recently though we either go to no. 1 barbecue or the thai resto along bay road. he likes chinese while i like pinoy, thai or indian. i don’t like spicy food but i like the coconut ice cream and indian bread.

***Where is the farthest you two have traveled together as a couple?
auckland

***Who has the craziest exes?
i win. (but only because i am open about it). he somehow zip up when the topic of exes arise. they weren’t probably worth remembering at all. kinsa to?

***Who has the worst temper?
i win. i go berserk. but but but only after na puno na gyud ko.

***Who does the cooking?
he does the cooking. (assisted by insoy)

***Who is the neat-freak?
we both are but i am a better cleaner.

***Who is more stubborn?
he is “kulit” so i guess i am stubborn.

***Who hogs the bed?
i am happy to stay put in one position when comfortable. he snores! so he is the hog in bed. hehehe.

***Who wakes up earlier?
i am the 5:00 am person. my body clock is accurate.

***Where was your first date?

mcdonald’s along roxas boulevard (with a gay chaperone). our official “just us” date would be at dinghow. time sa. maybe it was sunburst.

***Who is more jealous?
when we were younger, he is more vocal about his jealousy but i can create a scene when my imagination or intuitions become real. so i guess we are both the seloso/selosa types. as we have grown older, we have not had any jealousy induced fights.

***How long did it take to get serious?
7 years until I decided we should be serious and get married. I did ask him to marry me. =) baga ko ug face.

***Who eats more?
we eat a lot.

***Who does the laundry?
me, me, me.

***Who’s better with the computer?
i taught him how to do enye on a mac. ñ (cool, aye?)

***Who drives when you are together?

he drives and i navigate. i am better at directions. men don’t read signs. (i can prove it).

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I am nothing but a  second rate trying hard copy cat. =) Thanks Kaith for sharing.

February 25, 2009

Remembering 2008 (Part 4. Insoy and Basti)

Filed under: Uncategorized — konsuy @ 10:14 am

When Roland left for Auckland, my parents took in the kids. They have not enrolled in school where Insoy would have been in 1st year high school and Basti in Grade 4. Instead, to keep them pre-occupied until our permanent residency is approved, Insoy worked with Only Furnitures while Basti helped in Grandma’s kitchen assisting Mana Tuling & Lalay Linda.

Every morning, Insoy would go with Mom to Talisay. They would commute. His office was a few blocks away where my Mom worked. He had allowance he could spend for lunch. He would file the records of the furniture workers, answer phone calls, do excel worksheets, type something, log in to the SSS website to get some information, do anything…

I remembered I spent my summers working with Norkis Trading before doing filing and typing work too. Now, it is Insoy’s turn. I know this will teach him all about hard work and the value of money.

In an effort to prepare them for life in Auckland without helpers, Basti was trained in washing the dishes, sorting out the laundry, folding clothes and cooking simple dishes at home.

On weekends, Insoy would crave to go to Opon where his cousins on Roland’s side of the family were. They would play basketball, use the cellphone for uyab uyab, friendster galore and guitar jamming. He enjoyed staying there compared to staying at “Saints” (my shortcut for Sto Nino Village, it was the village’ basketball team name too)

Insoy pleaded that he live in Opon while waiting for his trip to Auckland. My dad agreed only if Basti would go with him. He cannot allow them to be separated. Unfortunately, Basti enjoyed his stay at Saints because he enjoyed being pampered and watching TV in an airconditioned room. =) Don Basti could not see himself enjoying a stay in Opon where Lalay’s pochero will never be served.

It was an ordeal that they fought out. Insoy felt tortured in Saints. My dad was strict with his diet. He did not have cousins to talk to. No one to jam the guitar with because my Dad insisted on silence inside the house. Curfew/sleeping time was at 9:00 pm. He cried and phoned us to let him travel to Auckland soon. His only outlet was his work. And the weekends that he was to visit Opon, he bribed Basti to go with him so that they be allowed to go.

Basti on the other hand, seeing that Insoy had a salary, asked my mom to bring him to work too so he gets a salary.

And thus, every morning, the 3 of them set out to work. But what does Basti do? He rides the ’sikad’ and buys bread for Kuya Insoy and his boss – for merienda time. Glamorized messenger slash Nuisance. He interviews people at work until they realize they have yet to get back to work. Only to realize that they had a hard time conversing in English when Basti can speak Bisaya fluently. My gulay.

I’m sure my mom had a dent on her budget with this two tagging along with her daily. Plus the fact that she wasn’t able to do much work with Basti around, interviewing her too.

Insoy bought a skateboard so Basti won’t be too bored at Saints. Unfortunately, that did not go too well. Basti broke his left arm for the second time. Insoy blamed himself no end for this and threw the board away only to be picked up by Lalay Linda and stored in the bodega while Basti was recuperating in Chong Hua.

Alas, another delay to the trip.  Winter looming. Another delay. Insoy had become frustrated, anxious and temperamental. They fought. Each day was misery.

Insoy went to Opon on weekends by himself. He overstayed the weekend visits to the point of missing work for days. Basti stayed at Saints, scratching the edge of his cast, while watching the shows that Dad watched. Each time we called, the question would be “When are we going there?”.

It was painful to be separated from them. Each night we prayed the winter would end soon.

Insoy spent all of his salary by sponsoring a despidida for himself together with his cousins. (and we thought he would spend it wisely and save some for his trip).

Basti bought a cheap necklace for his friend Teody.

Now we know who is the tightwad between the two.

The skateboard never got to Auckland.

Insoy now wants to find a job that could earn him money while Basti does the folding of clothes and cleaning up the table. Cooking will have to be Insoy’s task for now.

I am just glad that they are now here. And I am sure they are happy to be here too.

Insoy still misses his cousins while Basti misses Daddylo’s constant nagging for him to ‘usap usap’ during meal time so he does not get constipated. But both of them surely misses Mommyla – their roomie and workmate.

January 25, 2009

Louie Vui

Filed under: Uncategorized — konsuy @ 2:56 pm

my imitation LV

my imitation LV

Yesterday, we drove up to North Shore to pick up the bag that my mom sent me through someone who just arrived from a Cebu vacation. She does random acts of kindness or perhaps she can’t help but be concerned that I have been using the same bag day in and day out when she visited.

There is a shop at the back of USJR that sells really good imitation bags. It is a hole on the wall. They keep the good buys at the hidden corner of the store and the tinderas usually have favorite customers who they lead to this special corner. Some even send text messages when new bags arrive.  My mom and sister frequents this place. I used to come along with them too.

And always, it feels like “richness” to own a bag like this. Feels like shopping in Beverly Hills.

Thank you Mother.

January 19, 2009

Blissful January

Filed under: Uncategorized — konsuy @ 10:43 am

I am THANKFUL

* for the successful and well attended Sinulog 2009 in Auckland

* for having started the year with a phone call from Colorado. She is someone with the most beautiful mind and heart.

* for sons who does house chores without being told, finally a routine they are used to

* for a cozy wedding in Singapore last January 9. I love this couple.

* for new found friends and conversations over food at a Vietnam Restaurant along NewMarket

* for pasalubongs from Cebu. I get to touch the item that my family touched and lovingly sent our way. I feel the love.

* for finding the webcam that will work with the mac. Soon! I am super excited. Once this is setup, I will work on a microphone next. =) Lahi ra ang images nga amang.

* for friends who I reconnected with through FaceBook

* for hand me downs from Alfred and Merced who did not want to take them old cabinets to their newly acquired house.  They are now in each of our bedrooms.

* for the beautiful & magical photographs of weddings, the sinulog, everyday beauty in life and inspiring stories from the very talented people I stalk.  It inspires.

January 17, 2009

Viva Pit Senyor

Filed under: Uncategorized — konsuy @ 2:25 am

Viva, viva, viva Pit Senyor

December 28, 2008

10 Months Ago…

Filed under: Uncategorized — konsuy @ 11:28 am

This video was taken 10 months ago before I left for Auckland.

I just chanced upon this video while looking at AccountMate’s 2008 Christmas Presentation that landed them another win for 2 years in a row now.

Thank you Elijah for putting this all together.

I am proud to have been a part of AccountMate.

This is the part where I get emotional and weep like a baby. I will never forget how my friends and family made me feel that day. My head is swollen and I am feeling cocky today.

December 13, 2008

Merry December

Filed under: inspiration, mood, quotes — konsuy @ 1:46 am

happy

I AM THANKFUL

* for dearest friends Adrian and Chelo who started the spirit of Christmas alive for our family. We all flipped over to find your present in our mail box. We love it and I wish London was a bus ride away…they brought HAPPY to our Christmas.

* for Roland’s 4?’nd birthday. Finally perfecting the pochero ala Linda was the best dinner we ever had. No gift giving, only comfort food and dreams and wishes and stories shared around the dinner table. It is our new definition of ‘BLISS’.

*  for good marks on Basti’s year end report. He told me one morning, ‘Mom, I hope you can come to our school? I am singing a song. NZ’s got talent will be there. Told him I won’t be able to make it (i know, i am a useless parent a lot of times) but I will send my personal angel Gabriel to be with him that day. He came home and told me he did a mime instead of a song and that my angel brought home his report card. It says he has a spelling age of a 13.5 year old (yet he just turned 10).

* for a new project at work that is keeping me busy. Now I don’t have to do idiotic ways to preoccupy myself and look busy.

* for a talented and expectant friend Liza who has finally created her own photo blog.  http://monkeyseye.blogspot.com/ . Visit her site and comment. She would love that. She has an equally talented cousin who dreams of unicorns. <hint hint>

* for a chance to dance the Sinulog next year. I have signed up to join the Liturgical Dance to open the 9 days novena. I will do my best to please Him up there.

* for Christmas parties that allow me to meet new friends. Lechon, line dancing, new friends, must go. And meeting May and Lester (friends of Deebangs).  must Multiply.

* for finally taking the wheel. Roland’s driver’s license expired yesterday and he has yet to get NZ license. Meanwhile, I drive. He navigates. New adventures. Bag-ong lalis. =)

* for internet connection that is back to speed. Gods of Telecom. Thank you.

* for lazy Saturdays that allow me to catch up on blog updates. Yehey.

Wishing you all the Merriest of Christmas and a New Year filled with Hopes and Dreams fulfilled and Adventures to conquer. Thank you for the gift of friendship.

November 25, 2008

Wednesdays

Filed under: Uncategorized — konsuy @ 9:19 pm

Wednesday is my favorite day of the week. It is closest to Friday. I don’t count Thursdays because it is the day that I feel it is already a Friday. While Friday feels like Saturday and Saturday like Sunday. I am weird.

I took the day off because I was feverish this morning. I wanted it to be a sleep all I want day. I woke up to take a pee. Checked on the kids. They were gone. It must be the biogesic messing my sense of time.

The kids’ room is in a mess. Our room is in a messier state. The laundry basket is filled to the brim. The carpet needs vacuuming. The boys left the breakfast plates and cups on the table in a hurry not to be late for school. Basti was going on a trip to Stardome. Insoy was having a test. I don’t have time to pity myself. The toilet needs cleaning. A prescription from a doctor needs getting. I hate driving alone to the city. Hubby doesn’t arrive until 5:00 pm.

Fever gone. Anxiety attack kicking in. The neurosis of having a messy house is overpowering. I need to do it now. Start with the rooms or with the kitchen? Think! I can only sleep when all is back in its order. Oh, but I also need to study for the driving test. And emails to reply to. Vitamin C to overdose myself with. And I need to take a bath. Water my plants. Do the beds. Should I do breakfast and lunch together, its 10:30 now. Is there time left for rest? The kids will be back by 3:00. The house will be messy again. Argh. But until then, I will clean.

I love Wednesdays!

November 15, 2008

Austin and Nonie

Filed under: Uncategorized — konsuy @ 7:18 am

Life is fleeting but the memories you leave behind will linger until the next story…

flowers

Story No 1

It was around 5:00 pm on September 25 that we heard a scream from woman down the street. Our office is next to the parking area towards Mills Lane where Austin Bernard Hemmings became a hero. My male office mates immediately checked it out and found a man bleeding to death on the street. We had our own warden Sara who tried her best to save him. Unfortunately, Austin died. Austin was an IAG broker manager who was ready on his way home from work when he saw a man beating up a Maori woman.  Austin helped the woman but was stabbed repeated in the chest instead. He ran bleeding and called for help coming back into the BNZ building where he worked but no one was around. The spot where he died on the street and the building where he left traces of his blood is where I pass to work every day. When he died, the police blocked the area for 2 weeks and mourners placed flowers, prayer notes, goodbye letters, trinkets. A man was arrested. Austin’s face was plastered on the walls and despite me not knowing him, I felt like crying for him.

He was married, had 2 daughters and a son, a wife, a brother and friends who continue to pray for him. Last friday, they had a mass on the spot where he died. I took the long way to the office for several weeks because I get goose bumps and emotional when I see reminders. Then, one Friday, Normita rang me. She invited me for Chinese dinner. Because of my excitement, I left early from work and took the nearest route. Yup, via BNZ tower/Mills Lane. It was only when I was on the street that I remembered I was not supposed to pass there. Too late. Panicking, I ran and panted towards Normita’s bank. She noticed it took me less time to arrive than usual. Aha. Nahadlok diay.

I now pass the BNZ tower/Mills Lane because it is after all the nearest route to the office but never without a prayer that Austin will not suddenly show up bloody and all. Kiwi’s call me a “pussy”. In the US, that would probably mean another thing.

Story No 2

Before my mom arrived in Auckland, he started to contact his friends who now live here. In other words,  she announced her arrival. =) The Dinolan, Flores, Manalo and several other families organized a picnic slash chit chat marathon at Long Bay Park. There we met Antonino Dinolan. He sat there in pain but he was happy. He told us he had gall bladder stones and was waiting to be operated on.

Tall, tough, hardworking, family man – written all over him. A few days later, the Sto Nino Novena group announced he was in the hospital for an operation. We prayed for healing. Then a few days later, another prayer request was for him. Why? Because the doctors found he had pancreatic cancer. It was painful. He only had a few months to live. The family was advised to bring him out of the hospital so they can be with him through the remaining days of his life. He had a 5 year old daughter and an 8 year old son, a wife, sisters and inlaws, nieces and nephews, a father and mother. Barely 2 months since his diagnosis, he died. 11th of November.

All he wanted was a repeat of the Long Bay park picnic because he enjoyed seeing everyone talk and laugh. But he didn’t make it to the repeat picnic. But we can. We don’t know when it will happen but for sure when it does, Nonie will be perched somewhere above the clouds with wings. I cried silent tears today seeing his children touching his hand when his casket was opened for viewing before the 6 feet under ceremonies. They probably thought he was just sleeping. It was heart ripping.

He had insurance that took care of the expenses but he did not have a will. Unfortunately, one needed a will for the wife to get a penny from his estate. Everyone talked about it. Some ready to go to court that minute to scream foul. (Some people can get OA). Passionate Bisdaks. It was a funny scene more than a sad scene because of the oldies who had opinions. We left the cemetery, with a note to ourselves.

“Make a will soon.”

Life is fleeting.

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